Looking for something to do this weekend? How about watching a bunch of horny singles *not* touch each other? If you’re intrigued, you probably should be. Too Hot to Handle, dropping April 17, is the newest reality dating show from Netflix, the same streaming giant that gave us The Circle and also pretty much predicted quarantine dating with Love Is Blind. It’s straight up bonkers. And also, you won’t be able to look away.
The show, which introduces viewers to 10 stereotypically attractive contestants from around the world (five men and five women), takes place on a super gorgeous, super secluded island. But while the contestants, who describe themselves as “the sexiest people in the world” (love that for them), may think that they’re in for a mix of Love Island and Bachelor in Paradise (a.k.a. a horny hump-a-thon), they—and we—are sadly mistaken. Shortly after arriving on the island, the contestants are told that they’re not allowed to kiss or engage in any sexual activity (including masturbation) while on the island. And if any of the contestants—who BTW all sleep in one room and share twin-sized beds—break the rules, they’re docked money from a $100,000 prize pool. ICYW: A kiss will set you back $3,000…so stakes are HIGH. And while it may seem like a strict no physical contact rule would be hard to enforce, the show keeps an eye on all the contestants through Lana—an intelligence surveillance system that keeps score and calls out contestants for covert boinking—because we are, after all, in 2020.
This honestly sounds like hell, and we love it.
Read this next: 10 Things You Didn’t Know About Netflix’s Love Is Blind
So, why exactly would anyone subject themselves to this kind of no-touch torture? For love and self-reflection, of course! Throughout the eight episodes, contestants take part in challenges, forming friendships and relationships that are meant to go just beyond the physical, in order for contestants to find “deeper and more meaningful connections.” Fun fact: Canadian Relationship and intimacy expert Shan Boodram guest stars, leading the hapless contestants through self-love workshops.
Not sold yet? First of all, you 100% should be, and second of all, if a group of greased up, buff singles talking about blue balls (which is not really a thing, for the record) doesn’t appeal to you, then the relatability of the show should. With everyone currently quarantining thanks to COVID-19, the show is actually super relatable. A ton of horny guys and gals who are forced to keep their distance? Sounds like my life right now.