When Jersey Shore first graced television screens, I was in university and—to be completely honest—in awe of this cast’s ability to party. I was around the same age as many of the cast members at the time, and we were all going out, making questionable fashion choices and living our best young lives—the only difference is that they were doing it in front of cameras. Nearly a decade later, with Jersey Shore: Family Vacation premiering on April 5, I discovered that I now relate to this cast in an entirely new way: the hangovers are much, much worse.
“We went harder because we appreciate it more,” Vinny Guadagnino tells me, during the cast’s visit to Toronto.
What Guadagnino is referring to is that the fact that the cast, although no longer comprised of unattached 20-somethings, is still ready to party. Yes, things have changed, but their antics haven’t really. From what we can tell from media reports, it seems like going into this season, Paul “Pauly D” DelVecchio is the only single person in the house. Six years ago, when Jersey Shore ended, Nicole “Snooki” Polizzi was pregnant; she’s since married her Jionni and together they have two children. Similarly, Jenni “JWoww” Farley married her Jersey Shore juicehead boyfriend Roger Matthews and they now have two beautiful—and hilarious—children. Deena Nicole Cortese just got married, Ronnie Ortiz-Magro is expecting his first child with girlfriend Jen Harley and Vinny Guadagnino appears to have a girlfriend as well. Another big change: Mike “The Situation” Sorrentino is now sober and has pleaded guilty to tax fraud. He faces up to five years in prison and will be sentenced on April 25, three weeks after the premiere of Jersey Shore: Family Reunion.
Without giving away any spoilers, the cast made it clear to me that their dedication to getting buck wild on this reboot has not only stayed the same—it’s reached an entirely new level.
“People had their kids, but we left all that sh-t at home,” says Guadagnino.
“It was a real vacation,” adds Ortiz-Magro.
Multiple cast members tell me that being away from financial, family and professional responsibilities, coupled with nostalgia of their old Jerzdays, gave them free reign to let loose and rage even harder. This Family Reunion was basically like the May Two-Four cottage weekend with your university buds when suddenly breakfast beers become acceptable, and there’s pressure to cram in as much partying as possible before heading back to real life. Been there.
“We were all hot messes,” says Cortese. “You would think we were going to be more mature, but no, I think we were the most dramatic this time.”
While their partying capacity didn’t seem to change, the cast admitted that their hangovers are definitely worse.
The cure? Depends on who you ask.
“Beer the next day in the morning cures up your hangover,” says Ortiz-Magro. Guadagnino nodded in agreement.
Cortese and Farley rely on Pedialyte, a medical-grade hydration formula that is typically given to children to help them recover from vomiting or diarrhea. They also noted that this time around, they managed to get intravenous vitamin drips, also known as “banana bags,” but where or how they got those is unclear (perhaps it’ll be revealed in Family Vacation?).
“Now we’re older, if we’re going to drink as much as we did when we were younger, we gotta figure something out,” says Cortese, adding that for her that specifically means staying away from shots (amen, sister!). Likewise, Farley opted to drink more tequila because, even though it’s not her booze of choice, she finds it doesn’t give her as bad of a hangover (I do not relate to this at all).
The cast may have their go-to remedies, but they made one thing clear: there is no cure for the aftermath of Ortiz-Magro’s notoriously dangerous Ron Ron juice cocktail. But hey, that’s what vacations are for, right?
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