All the Reasons the New Webseries Bonkers Closets Will Make You Feel Seriously Icky

From tone-deaf subjects to tacky fashion, Bonkers Closets truly sucks

Meet Jamie Chua. She is a Singaporean Insta-famous socialite who owns more than 200 Hermès bags, 300 pairs of shoes and racks upon racks of designer clothes—casual. She obvi needs a home for all that stuff, which is where her 700-square-foot closet, equipped with fingerprint access, a sliding storage system of 10 cabinets and rows of drawers for her diamonds, comes in.

If you want a closer look, Insider—the arm of Business Insider that handles all their social videos—is here to make that happen. Their new series, aptly (albeit not at all creatively) named Bonkers Closets, gives you a tour of the spaces that house the clothes of the super rich and semi-famous. The first webisode is focused on Chua with the six and a half minute vid serving up pans of her many handbags, shoes, jackets, gowns and jewellery. And after watching her stroll through her closet, pulling out racks and opening drawers, all the while with five-figure U.S. dollar amounts popping up on the screen, she says, “it’s still not enough for me.”

Have you picked your jaw up off the ground? Good. Now let’s review what Chua says isn’t enough. The tour starts off (relatively) small with a Chanel tweed jacket worth $3,850. From there, we see an Ashi dress that’ll set you back $6,000, a Gucci fox fur coat that rings in at $19,000 and a custom Rami Kadi gown that cost $27,000 (she makes the host hold this one because it weighs a whopping 66 pounds). We get a few of the Hermès bags priced out, too—a cool $75,000 for a Doll bag, $29,800 for a wicker one and a Mini Pochette at $11,800. She calls that last one “useless” with a laugh because it’s legit smaller than an iPhone 8.

Don’t get me wrong: looking at all the fancy things in Chua’s closet has its voyeuristic fun, and there are a lot of pieces in there that are beautiful and rare. She also seems relatively approachable and sometimes even funny. But beyond that, the whole thing is just straight-up gross.

Most obviously gross part: we shouldn’t be uncritically celebrating someone’s stupid amount of expensive clothing when there’s so much poverty in the world, especially when that person seems so out of touch with reality, right? The poorest people in the world right now live on $1.90 a day, so it would take them 5,798 days to afford that $11,000 useless bag Chua giggled about.

Next hideous thing: the items they decided to showcase of Chua’s sprawling collection make her look like a total fashion victim. She shows off her Valentino Rockstuds, the shoe that everyone was wearing in 2015. She later picks out a pair of Roger Vivier sneakers that are also v. played out. And while a Birkin bag is one of the most classic things anyone can own, having 200 is a little desperado. Why not change it up and buy a quietly luxurious Céline or a JW Anderson beauty? Money does not buy taste, and this is the perfect example of that.

Finally, the last cringe-worthy thing is the production value. Who approved this video? For something that is so obviously clickbait-y and was clearly designed to generate a ton of views, why does it look like they pulled it together on a shoe-string budget? The graphics and fonts look like something even the producers of Cribs would have rejected.

The whole thing comes off as a careless run-through of excessive wealth and shopping, which is hard to stomach when there are zero questions asked to challenge the wildly exorbitant spending. This is particularly weird and ironic—and pretty uncomfortable—re: the latest episode which is all about Jackie Siegel’s 2,000-square-foot closet in Orlando. Siegel was the subject of the 2012 documentary Queen of Versailles, focused on the massive home she and her husband are building and how everything started to fall apart when they lost all their money in the 2008 financial crisis. You watch them struggle through laying off their servants, see Jackie attempt to quit her shopping habits and then it all ends with no resolution.

So now… they’re back to being rich? Who knows. The peeps over at Bonkers Closets, naturally, are more focused on her whack of furs.


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