Sharleen Joynt on Bachelor in Paradise: Episode 2

Opera singer Sharleen Joynt—fellow Canuck, FLARE columnist and former Bachelor contestant—shares her take on the television gold that is BiP

bachelor in paradise

The cast (Photo: Facebook/BachelorinParadise)

This show is absolutely, 100 percent saved by the fact that it makes relentless fun of itself. If Bachelor in Paradise took itself seriously the way The Bachelor/ette does, it would be too painful to watch. The new 1980s-themed intro song was one of many examples of the self-mockery and was nothing short of brilliant. Watching Jared cheesily pop out from behind a tree, Kirk prop his head on his hands in the sand, and Ashley I. pose on the rocks like Ariel from The Little Mermaid? Well played, BiP producers, well played.

Clare was brought back to ruffle feathers and it got me wondering for the millionth time how this girl is still single. Unlike with The Bachelor/ette, the cast of BiP is paid to be there. However, money aside it’s still hard to imagine a woman as gorgeous and sweet as Clare needs the shit-covered fan that is Bachelor in Paradise to get a date. Why revisit the show that edited you to look like you talk to animals?

On the topic of Clare, I give her mad props for making it clear to Mikey that she didn’t necessarily want to be “paired off” with him. Whether or not he understood her (I think we all have our doubts about that), she expressed it kindly and still made the best of her date with him. It’s human nature to take the path of least resistance, and the path of least resistance for Clare would have been to lead Mikey on. I appreciated that she didn’t just go with the flow and let him kiss her.

The best is when a guy is endeared by a woman’s weirdness, not put off by it. Dan and Ashley S. seem to speak the same language (the language of Weird? Or Parrot?). I loved that when Ashley S. was told she had a date card, she immediately looked directly at Dan who was right next to her in the pool and said, “I’m taking Dan.” It occurred to me that that first instinct decision is how this show should work, rather than everyone’s constant trepidation about offending each other and their fear of stepping on others’ toes. It’s actually kind of counterproductive to stake a claim (or, in the words of Ashley I., “claim a stake”) early on, especially when you consider that this is supposed to be about love. Wouldn’t you rather choose and be chosen based on an informed decision about all parties involved? Nothing spells lasting relationship like ending up together by default.

As for Tenley’s last-minute scrambling, the feminist in me couldn’t stand it. Tenley is an accomplished, beautiful and kind person. And she was right to say to the girls, about getting a rose, “I don’t want to work for it.” Therefore, it killed me to see her basically ask JJ to kiss her to see if something’s there. Isn’t that the reverse order of how it should be? I realize it worked out in her favour; had she not been aggressive she might have gone home. But, honestly… is home so bad?

Bachelor in Paradise airs Sundays and Mondays on City.

For more from Sharleen Joynt, visit her blog, All the Pretty Pandas.

And don’t forget: if you have a romantic dilemma that you’d like Sharleen’s take on, please let us know! Email your queries to editor@flare.com, leave a comment below, tweet us @FLAREfashion or post on our Facebook page using #AskSharleen. Then look for her reply in FLARE’s October issue.

Bachelor in Paradise:

Sharleen Joynt on Bachelor in Paradise: Episode 1

Ask Sharleen:
How Do I Get Back in the Game After Years Spent Single?
Why Is my BF Icing Me Out on Social?
How Do I Get Out of the Friend Zone?

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