Our Best Guesses on the Bieber Wedding Theme

The Biebers’ big day could turn out to be anything from a Kennedy-esque wedding to Tana Mongeau and Jake Paul 2.0

Katherine Singh
(Photo: Getty Images)

It’s almost the big day, Beliebers! On September 30, Hailey and Justin Bieber are *finally* goin’ to the chapel and they’re gonna get married. Or, at least, they’re finally going to have their long-awaited, massively planned and super-hyped wedding.

Or, more aptly: Can you beliebe?! Because we seriously thought the day would never come.

More than a year after the couple made their union official in a NYC courthouse ceremony, and after what seems like eons of planning, sending out save-the-dates and rescheduling (this is the couple’s *fourth* attempt to go down the aisle), the Biebers are finally ready to make their vows in front of their friends and family—oh, and God as well. The celebration, which is set to take place at South Carolina’s Montage Palmetto Bluff hotel, is going to be an event for sure. And we have so many questions: Is Kendall Jenner a bridesmaid? Will it be catered by Tim Horton’s? Are the bride and groom going to seal the deal with matching tats (à la Ariana Grande and ex Pete Davidson)? But, most importantly, our biggest question is: WTF is the theme of this wedding? Because we’re kind of confused.

The couple themselves are a bit of an anomaly, and, TBH, they seem like a surprising match. We have Mrs. Bieber (née Baldwin) serving us classy Princess Diana looks in Vogue Paris—and then there’s her hubby-to-be, who’s known for trying to make socks and slides happen and peeing in a bucket. And their wedding seems to be following suit. Between Bieber purchasing a lavender dental grill and the couple’s choice of (chic) venue, the Biebers’ big day could turn out to be anything from a Kennedy-esque wedding to Tana Mongeau and Jake Paul 2.0 (officiated by a Hillsong pastor, of course). It’s anyone’s guess at this point.

The venue seems super classy

One of the big reasons we’re so thrown off about this shindig? The venue. While many people assumed the couple would be saying “I do” in Cambridge, Canada—where they purchased a home in September 2018—all reports point to the couple *actually* holding their nuptials down South. It appears the Biebers will wed at the Montage Palmetto Bluff hotel, and the venue is *gorgeous*. The luxury resort, which seriously looks like something out of a Nicholas Sparks book, boasts a chapel on the grounds that’s described as “timeless, elegant and full of Southern charm.”

Which are not exactly the words we’d use to describe the “Purpose” singer. TBH, we’re half expecting a bouncy castle to be erected in the background for the reception. Then again, who knows? True love changes people.

But the save-the-date cards were…unique

While the venue screams sophistication, the save-the-date cards are a little different. Photos obtained by TMZ show that the couple opted to go with a comic-book-style rendering of themselves. The cards feature a cartoon Mr. and Mrs. Bieber hugging with a speech bubble containing the date and general location of the big day.

TBH, this isn’t *that* surprising considering the couple seem to be big fans of cartoon versions of themselves—JBieb’s Insta is littered with photos of the pair’s drawn likeness.

They love it.

View this post on Instagram

Wait a minute that’s my gurl dog

A post shared by Justin Bieber (@justinbieber) on

Like, a lot.

The music is super sweet—and personal!

When it came to deciding who would sing at the wedding, the couple kept it close to home, choosing Canadian singer Daniel Caesar. Which is a *great* decision and seems like a surprisingly sweet choice for the “Sorry” singer. We’re putting our money on Caesar’s “Best Part” as the first-dance song. JBieb has sung publicly about his model wife making his life better, so having a first-dance song that’s about your partner being the best part of your life? That tracks.

But JBieb’s attire options are questionable

But when it comes to what Bieber might wear while twirling his bride around the dance floor? That’s a whole other issue. On September 26, the singer took to Instagram to have his fans weigh in on potential wedding tuxes, posting a series of photos that included a Pepto-Bismol-pink tux with matching top-hat, a rainbow-coloured tux and a tux-like T-shirt/shorts combo.

An additional post gave fans even more options, like a blood-spattered white suit and one printed with bananas.

“Help me choose a tux for my wedding,” the singer captioned the photos. Do we think our Canadian boy will *actually* prove he’s bananas for his bride by donning a fruit-printed suit? Probably not. But, honestly—maybe? This is, after all, the man who designed a line of corduroy clothes that essentially look like they belong to cult members. Which is fine! You do you, Biebs. We just can’t exactly see a blood-spattered suit fitting the whole “white clapboard, Southern charm” vibe. How would Hailey even match that?

There’s also the chance that Bieber might be upgrading his dental game for the big day. Just days before the shindig, Bieber took to Instagram to share his latest purchase: A lavender-coloured grill.

View this post on Instagram

Lavenders by @goldteethgod

A post shared by Justin Bieber (@justinbieber) on

Which, I mean, could maybe work? Lavender is a very soft colour; it definitely seems the *most* appropriate of any colour of grill to don at one’s wedding. Who knows—maybe it’s an early wedding gift from Mrs. Bieber to her hubby. Because nothing says “You may now kiss the bride” like a lavender-diamond-encrusted smile.

Our best guess?

So, when it comes to the theme of the Biebers’ upcoming big day, our best guess? We straight up have no idea. Mr. and Mrs. Bieber—and their diverse tastes—are chock-full of surprises, and we wouldn’t expect anything less from their nuptials. Will the groom walk down the aisle in a blinged-out “Drew” chain, his groomsmen decked out in corduroy jumpsuits? Maybe. Will every guest leave with their own lavender grill? Possibly. Or will it just be a plain old tasteful wedding and I’m completely wrong? Hmm, perhaps. We’ll just have to wait and see.

Either way, we still wouldn’t mind an invite.

Related:

Turns Out They *Are* Married—But Justin & Hailey Are Still Planning a Canadian Wedding
A Comprehensive Guide to Cambridge, Ont. (a.k.a. Justin & Hailey’s New Home)
Hailey Baldwin Changed Her Name on IG and I Feel Weird About It

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