We start this week’s ep right where we left off—Vanessa’s calling Nick out for “riding” Corinne in a pink bouncy castle. She totally puts him in his place. Good for you, V.
In the meantime, Corinne continues her nap—but it’s all fine because Michael Jordan and Abraham Lincoln took naps too.
The girls are getting upset about her absence so Taylor and Sarah wake (a v. disheveled) Corinne from her precious slumber to confront her. And she’s just like, “Why are Taylor and Sarah so obsessed with me?”
Moving on to the Rose Ceremony: all the girls are positive that Corinne is going home but obviously she gets the last rose.
The next morning Chris Harrison strolls in sans mimosa (he probs wishes he was back in Paradise rn) and tells the girls they’re about to begin their around-the-world journey with Nick.
First stop—Waukesha, Wisconsin, Nick’s hometown!
Nick meets up with his parents for an emotional chat. And the entire time they’re having this serious convo all we can think is, No way this woman had 11 kids, she looks fab!
Danielle L gets the first one-on-one of the episode. They walk the streets of Nick’s hometown and go into this bakery that has specially made “Nickerdoodles.” We still can’t decide if this is cute or creepy.
After decorating some cookies and eating Nick’s face they casually run into Amber, Nick’s ex. OKAY ABC, we’re having a hard time getting on board with this one.
Then Nick takes Danielle L. to a special park (where it sounds like he hooked up with like, half of Waukesha). They have a cute moment, but nothing to freak out over.
After their dinner date, Nick surprises her with a Chris Lane concert where they get serenaded on stage together for a second time this season and we still can’t help but feel v. awkward watching it.
Okay, group date time! They’re spending the day on a dairy farm and the girls are not impressed by the smell, especially Corinne who would rather be in a spa eating a taco (preferably chicken, obv.)
Anddd cut to the cutest image we’ve ever seen: Nick bottle-feeding a cow.
As expected, Corinne is not excelling at this date because she doesn’t “do chores.”
The girls are forced to shovel cow poo and Corinne’s just like, “NOPE.”
Corinne can’t deal with this *shituation* so she ditches the group date activities to sit on a rock.
She’s giving us maj flashbacks to Paris and Nicole on The Simple Life.
Moving on to the evening portion of the group date, a.k.a The Corinne Show.
The girls immediately start bitching about Corinne and she hears all of it.
So she decides to confront them.
And Jaimi’s reaction is literally all of us.
Sarah finally jumps in and asks the question we’ve alllll been waiting for.
Then Corinne decides to talk to Nick about it and they actually have a conversation instead of making out the entire time.
Kristina gets the group date rose (we’re not really sure why, TBH) and Corinne is piiissssed.
And now it’s time for Raven’s one-on-one, yay!
She gets to go to Nick’s little sister’s soccer game AND meet his parents. BEST DATE EVER.
Then they go roller-skating with Bella’s soccer team and we srsly can’t deal with the cuteness level. “Kiss Me” by Sixpence None the Richer starts playing and it’s literally a scene from a rom-com. This is one of our fave dates in Bach-history, and we don’t say that lightly.
During their dinner date Raven recaps Nick on the time she walked in on her boyfriend cheating on her. She tells Nick that she kicked the door down and beat her naked boyfriend with the other woman’s stiletto—ummm, can we be you? And Nick’s like, “I don’t know whether to be scared right now or turned on.” His face is really flushed.
After their picture-perfect date, Raven says she’s falling in love with Nick. Normally we would judge her for saying this so early on, but we fell in love with her in one night so we’re going to let it slide.
And now for the cocktail party. Corinne says she’s going to “rip Taylor a new one” and pulls her aside to do so.
Oh also, Corinne showed all of us why eating on The Bachelor is a no-no.
Anyway, back to the showdown. TBH, we couldn’t decide whose side we were on in this not-so-adult convo. Taylor quickly turns into Corinne’s therapist and talks to her like she’s a patient, which we found v. annoying.
Then Corinne (rightfully) calls Taylor out for talking down to her and once again, references her “multi-million dollar company.”
By the end of the episode, Corinne just “literally can’t even.”
And neither can we, because we were left with ANOTHER To Be Continued….
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