Bad Santa

Men. So easy to please, so baffling at gift time. And while you’d love to gift him an Oscar for Best Male Lead, there are a ton of presents out there that shouldn’t even be considered contenders. ‘It’s the thought that counts” might be all well and good for some (no wonder sock and tie sales spike in December) but as any extraordinary girlfriend knows, many are simply unworthy of his excellent performance. Here are the nominees…

 
electric razor

1. An electric razor
There’s something weird about a guy’s facial hair that makes it not respond immediately to a new cutting tool. They say it takes 4-6 weeks for it to adjust or something. Plus, guys have been shaving for eons, so they know all the top brands and models. Leave this purchase for him to choose.

 
magazine subscription

2. A magazine subscription
Even the serious lad mags sometimes toss in a barely clad beauty so do you really want him looking at someone else’s goodies? Unless you know the magazine has a G-rating from cover to cover (including any of the supplements), skip the subscriptions entirely.

 
Tools

3. Tools
Tools are a great gift for the man’s man. But as with any of his toys, he’s probably very particular about their type and make. If you aren’t Mrs. Handyman yourself, it’s best to steer clear of hardware stores entirely. Without knowing it, you might buy him something he already has or will never need.

 
The latest electronics

4. The latest electronics
Don’t bother getting your guy a new gadget. He already knows which toys are tops and which ones will give him proper bragging rights. You might think that picking up a BlackBerry Curve is brilliant even though he’s holding out for the new touch-screen Storm. Guys need to keep up with their egos, so if you buy him the wrong electronic, you might be cramping his style.

 
Fitness

5. Anything relating to working out
Giving your guy something that has to do with weight loss or building muscle mass just screams “I don’t like your bod.” Save your relationship and skip this gift. If you want to get him something that has to do with working out, wait until after Christmas. Then pretend you picked it out for yourself.

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