On Monday night, after The Bachelorette finale—which, let’s be honest, we’re all still bitter about—Chris Harrison gave us a sneak peek of Bachelor in Paradise season 4 and as we’ve previously mentioned, it looks AMAZING (mostly thanks to all the shirtless Dean shots).
We thought the BiP teaser was going to be the only joy in our lives that night, UNTIL Jimmy Kimmel came on and released episode 1 of Baby Bachelor in Paradise—his third installment to the Baby Bachelor franchise. And OMG you guys, it’s freaking hilarious.
From passionate playdates and canoodling in the pool, to flamingo sippy cups and doughnut floaties, Kimmel’s version of Paradise literally has everything we need.
We’ve got the villain, Mayzie, who wears heart-shaped sunnies and claims her favourite animals are sharks “because they EAT PEOPLE!!” (anyone else getting Alexis vibes from this one?). “I’m Mayzie and I’m crazy” is the first thing she says in her ITM intro and throughout the entire episode she brings more dramz than anyone else.
Serious question: can we be friends with Mayzie?
Then there’s Brendan, who Mayzie has her eyes on but, PLOT TWIST—Brendan has a wife back home who comes to Paradise to call him out. Hmmmm, remind you of anyone?
Our fave, however, is Alex, the bad boy who rides up on a motorcycle clad in red sunglasses and a black leather vest. I mean, COME. ON. A toddler in a little leather vest? Is there anything cuter? I think not.
Alex was recently let out of prison for “setting fire to a meth lab” (LOL) and is apparently a vape shop owner (LOL x 2). He brags about his Bachelorette runner-up status in his intro and says, “I was the bad boy, but I’m here to be a good boy.”
STOP. We can’t handle this cuteness.
There are a few other cuties who make appearances in episode 1—like Cosette, who loves bad boys and “makes bad decisions” and of course, to tie it all together, Kimmel plays the part of Chris Harrison in a beach-approps off-white suit. So, doesn’t get much better than that.
Watch the full five-minute episode here. Just beware of its heart-melting potential.